Reflections...

What you are about to read might not make a whole lot of sense... I'm not even sure what it is I want to say.  Nevertheless, I feel compelled to write.  So here goes.

Have you ever taken a step back from your life and tried to understand presumably the things that you don't fully grasp?  I sit and reflect and realize that my whole paradigm might be "out of whack". 

I wonder; why do I pursue the things I pursue?  And please understand that this is not the typical dramatic ponderings of an emotional musician. I really want to evaluate the things and people in my life.  What drives me?  What excites me?  What do I really, truly want from this life?  I think that any normal person would attempt to answer these questions about his or her life.. but is the answer so complicated?

I try to make it complicated, for sure.  I live and die by how I "feel" at a particular moment in time...this is deadly in almost all situations.  If I evaluate my life, and the people in it from my own emotional mind(even if I think I am being rational) I inevitably become disoriented and confused. 

I understand that this whole musing sounds vague and unbalanced...please know that that is pretty much how I feel.  But!! And this is a big BUT(at the risk of sounding self promoting and vein) "The sun is coming up again!"  This is truly the hope I have.  Every day is new and fresh.  God is in control, and I rely on Him.  If I start to become too focused on ANYthing else... I in turn feel lost.  If Christ gives me breath each day, I want to take each breath in praise and worship to Him. And if during the day I get off track(and that is quite an understatement) I know that when I go to sleep one of two things will happen: 1. I will die in my slumber and then be with Jesus, or 2. I will wake up know that "His mercies are new every morning". 

The end of the day always comes, and so ushers in the morning.